I am especially sensitive. Things like the light pollution affecting our home, or seeing unfairness, can make my mood drop all at once. But I do not want to be such a narrow person who cares about everything. I want to live with a bit more ease. That creates self-blame: why am I so narrow-minded, so petty?
Yesterday while driving, I thought about it and realized this is not really my fault. It is a matter of hormones and chemistry in my body. Why should I blame my own body? The more I blame myself, the more conflicted I become, and the deeper I sink into it. I have the right to deal with these things. I am not picking fights. My emotions and reactions are also being shaped by my hormones, and in that sense I am a victim too.